So ElsaDaughter and I were watching Brian Cox’s new documentary earlier, Human Universe. When I say we were watching it, I mean we had it on but of course she’s three-screening and I’m up and down, do this and do that, clear these away and turn that off so the chances of either of us actually understanding what he was on about with his parlexals (yeah,I’m pretty sure that’s not a thing) were pretty slim. Even if we had been paying attention, I still would’ve needed to Pause and Google at the end of every clause.
He showed some sort of diagram of the waxing and waning of the moon (I only recently discovered which was which and now I’ve forgotten again… Open Safari). I don’t know what that had to do with the universe being human (now there’s a philosophical topic) but I think I heard Galilelo who when you think about it had s really stupid name: Galilelo Galilei. Was he like the fourteen child if something whose parents just ran out of imaginative baby names? Like Phil and Gary Neville’s dad is Neville Neville. Wow. That’s taking lazy to a whole new level, which coincidentally rhymes with Neville. At least North West is a bit clever, KK came up with a pun.
Anyway, the diagram showed the waning moon (that’s the crescent right? I’ve actually just googled it again and it turns out I really don’t understand lunar phases and it’s very frustrating. I don’t get gravity or tides either but there you have it. I’m not a scientifically minded individual, I’m a poet, and of course, I don’t know it.) but if you look closely enough you can still see the faintest outline of the whole spherical wonder of greyness.
I had written, from here, about another four or five hundred words and I’ve lost it. I am so disappointed and raging. It was good shit I had written about the moon and the soul and it was very fucking metaphorical and insightful and now it’s gone. Which is typical. Find something good – throw it away.
Something about a pewter pearl always being there even when only the slenderest slice of the moon is visible and how it’s only our perception of it that changes, the moon itself being constant.
And Vitamin D. And having my period.
This is the kind of miniature-sized loss I can’t deal with.